262 Days

TWO HUNDRED AND SIXTY TWO⁣

FREAKIN’ DAYS!! 😭😭😭⁣

262 Days of more happiness. ⁣

263 Days of forgiveness. ⁣

262 Days of working through shame. ⁣

262 Days of self exploration. ⁣

262 Days of hope. ⁣

262 Days of speaking my truth.⁣

262 Days of surrendering. ⁣

262 Days of awareness. ⁣

262 Days of learning.⁣

262 Days of growth. ⁣

262 Days of hard work. ⁣

262 Days of saying no to temptation.⁣

262 Days SOBER. ⁣

I will choose this life everyday over and over for the rest of my life, no matter how challenging it is at times. ⁣

I am worth it. ⁣

💫💞🦏🙏🏻

Mexico

I’m not ready to put this on all of my social media outlets yet but need to get it out.

I’m struggling on this trip in Mexico.

It was a surprise wedding renewal.

The surprise was a complete shock, the ceremony was beautiful, but almost everything in between has not been great. Harrison was a wreck the first few days emotionally, and I’ve been in a dark place too.

I feel lonely, anxious and sad. It’s an awful feeling because I know danny put so much thought into this and all of our friends and family have been keeping it a secret for 6 months too.

Few things I keep thinking…

Everyone has been keeping this secret for 6 months. Soooo much sneakiness on Danny’s part. Maybe I feel lied to subconsciously?!? I don’t know.

Also last time I was in Mexico I got black out drunk and made a fool of myself. Not fun memories.

And then I’m feeling lonely. Like all of our friends here are bonding and having fun and I feel left out for some reason. Not their fault just how I’m feeling.

I’m just sad and ready to be home. I hate that I feel this way but it’s how I feel.

Trying to snap out of it. But it’s been hard.

Send some positive vibes my way if you happen to read this. 🙏🏻

8 months

EIGHT MONTHS SOBER TODAY 🎉🎉🎉

8 months ago I decided to start living more authentically, more raw, more real and more vulnerable than ever before. I decided that in order to be my best self I had to break down the walls I felt were causing my mind, body and soul to destruct…those walls were self hate and endless bottles of wine.

To say that these past 8 months have been trying, would be an understatement. There have been many tears and many breakdowns but also an abundance of hope.

😭

The best decision I’ve ever made in my life was the one where I claimed a life of sobriety. I used to be one of those people that didn’t think I could ever kick alcohol out of my life completely…I mean what about holidays, parties, stressful afternoons, or hot Summer days?!? I thought I NEEDED it. 😢

I was so wrong on so many levels.

Living life without numbing out with alcohol is eye opening.

-I’ve learned how corrupt our society is with the way we cram the most dangerous “drug” in our nation down everyone’s throats, and how our society feeds into it.

-I’ve learned who my real friends are.

-I’ve realized that there are a ton of people suffering with alcohol addiction silently behind closed doors too scared to speak up or ask for help.

-I’ve learned that I want to help those people find their strength and voice more than ever.

-I’ve learned that I can use my oils to support me mentally & emotionally like I never knew before.

-I’ve learned that I CAN live without alcohol during any situation no matter how uncomfortable it gets sometimes.

-I’ve learned that I’m a freaking STRONG bad ass woman who deserves to live life fully in her truth.

Best decision ever. ♥️ #Sobriety

Sober Mama

I used to be a high ranking member in the Mommy Wine Culture. 🍷 I used to think that after a hard day, heck sometimes after a hard morning I “deserved” a mimosa or a glass of wine. At the first sign of stress I reached for my favorite cute wine glass and filled it to the top. When Harrison was being super EXTRA for the day I thought I owed it to myself for putting up with him…that diving into a bottle was the answer to allll of my problems. 😢

But what I started to learn was that alcohol solves nothing, and most of the time just makes everything worse for me. Anxiety, stress, sleepless nights, irritability, ailments…it made it all worse. Sure sometimes when I was out with other mommies having some wine I felt happy in the moment because I was able to loosen up and not feel so awkward but that night I would pay for it with no sleep, and the next morning feeling like shit.

I also used to be the 20 something that would brag about not getting hangovers. HAHA…that all changed by like 27 but by then I was addicted and I didn’t care what the consequences were. That’s what alcohol does…it tricks you into thinking you need it and that it’s worth the consequences that come with it. #addiction ☠️

I chose sobriety for a million reasons that I’m sure I will continue to share over this journey but one of the most important reasons for sobriety is that I don’t want Harrison to grow up without a mommy. Sound dramatic? Maybe to you but I wasn’t present, I was risking my life and I was numbing out all of life with wine. I don’t want to teach my son that when things get tough you drink. I don’t want to teach him that alcohol is the answer to his problems because it’s not the answer for anything. That’s just what society is teaching us.

So I made a decision to make the HARD choices needed to make a drastic change in my life and the life of my son. I can honestly say it’s the best decision I have ever made. EVER. Sobriety has increased every other area of my life for the better. Is it tough being a Sober Mama in this world? For me, YES, but it’s the best way for me. Is it easy FEELING ALL THE FEELINGS?!? No, it plain sucks somedays, but I truly believe we are meant to feel the pain to make us stronger. 💪🏻

So for all of you other sober mamas out there struggling through a rough day, SOBER…I SEE YOU and I am cheering you on so hard!! XO💗🦏🙏🏻

230 Days

Heading to a Gala all dressed up tonight and as I was getting ready I couldn’t help but think that in the past before these types of events I’d be drinking wine or champagne while I got ready. Not to celebrate the occasion but to take the edge off before I went to be around or in front of people. Getting dressed up is out of my comfort zone and being around big crowds of people is out of my comfort zone. So in the past I would get buzzed before doing either. Now I get dressed up and ready Sober. I embrace the fancy-out-of-my-comfort-zone dresses Sober. I go in crowds Sober. I do life SOBER.

230 Days…Celebrating every moment. ❤️

7 Months

Woke up to celebrate life and 7 Months Sober with this beautiful view, a cappuccino and my man as we wait for our couple’s massage right here in our room! ♥️

7 months with no alcohol is so long but also so little. Most days are pretty easy when it comes to choosing not to drink, and then there are a few that can knock me to my knees. It’s on the hard days that I dig deeper and fight harder because I know what the other side looks and FEELS like. I’d choose a tough day sober over an easy day drinking anytime! 🙌🏻

Life is just better for me without alcohol.

Period.

I’m learning to just “be”.

To sit in the silence and feel my way through every memory and every thought without escaping from them in the bottom of a bottle.

To just “BE” is a beautiful thing.

It’s brave. I am brave.

Here’s to 7 months going on an eternity.

💫💞🎉🙏🏻

Sobriety + The Starter Kit

I don’t know how I’d do life much less sobriety without my oils. Watch my video linked below to explain 💗